"Life goes on"
11:39 p.m. & 2004-06-02

you know...a year ago yesterday..something very special happened. Something that still makes me smile. Sadly...sometimes i wish i wouldnt think of the happier times and other times...i guess i just need to smile like that. I found a picture that i had taken that day. That day, me alan, and eliott were sittin around in my room..watching miss universe, when we got this crazy wack idea to invite Andy over. For the first time in ever Andy came over...we took some stupid pictures, and i remember laughing so hard at being so stupid together. He took a picture of me and him...i found that picture earlier, and instead of it bringing me to tears...i smiled and laughed a bit...and remembered how we had put a frog in his truck when he got to my house and he threw it out. It was soo mean...and yet so funny. ..how that marked the beginning of a week that would change both our lives for the next coming year. When we started going out...i hoped it would last forever...but i knew that all good things must end.. but when it did end...our friendship didnt..it was special..what we had was special...a year later i would have never thought it would have ended like this. Sadly things turned out like this...me longing for a friendship that is lost blindly, and him with someone who he thinks he's in love with. If i had the chance to tell him anything...i tell him "Look at everything...everything around us....of course you have all these gurls that like you...i know this too...but take a look around through there eyes, and you wont find anyone they love...Many girls will like you in your lifetime...but i love you and i always will. Hurt and miscommunication come often in a relationship. Its how people grow...perfection doesnt come easy through true love. When you're ready...you'll see it too....i can only hope." I still cry...i still miss my friend, but i still hurt from his harsh wording. Maybe his little "speech on paper" to me, was my first look at what the real world is like. Full of cold-hearted bastards that dont see reason, even if its staring them in the face. Its true i have a lot of anger in my heart, but at least now, im aware of what a real friend is....right?! wasnt this your the plan in the first place. Life wont ever be the same...but it will go on.

then || now

Miss Anything?

lost in space - 2005-06-12
look what happens when your happy. - 2005-01-29
everydrawing that i drew was never ever true to you - 2004-12-26
New Home - 2004-08-25
rip carter - 2004-08-16